
Bumblebee (PG.)
Directed by Travis Knight.
Starring Hailee Steinfeld, John Cena, John Ortiz, Pamela Adlon and Jorge Lendeborg Jr. Out on Boxing Day. 114 mins.
Every movie studio is in the business of universe building, so in 2015 Paramount decided that they would join in by building one around Transformers, the fighting robots who can turn into cars. It seemed like a sound choice then as, however rubbish they were, each of the films made a fortune, over a billion dollars in the case of Trans 3 and 4. And then, wouldn't you know, no sooner had they announced their plan than the fifth one came out and barely made half as much as the previous one. That's just typical isn't it? Of all the times for the audience to develop a sense of discernment.
Bumblebee is the tentative first step in this expanded Transformers universe, a kind of children's Transformer film, a prequel set in 1987 and centred on the small yellow and black transformer. Having escaped from their war-torn home planet Cybertron just as it was being taken over by the Decepticons, Bumblebee is sent to Earth to prepare a resistance base for the good Trannies, the Autobots. If I'd just been fooled by a foe called the Decepticons I think I'd bury myself away on a planet called Eggonmyfacetron, or Doh;howdidIfallforthatville. Once on Earth, he loses his memory, hides out as a VW beetle, is brought back to life by a mechanically minded teenage girl called Charlie (Steinfeld) and helps her deal with all her standard American movie teen angst.
I think they were aiming for this to be the ET of Transformers movies, but it's more like the Pete's Dragon of Transformers movies, or rather a John Hughes version of Herbie Rides Again. His classic Breakfast Club is liberally referenced and 80s tunes (Smiths, Simple Minds, A-ha, Rick Astley) are blasted out whenever there is a break in the noise. My assumption was that in making a more kid-friendly Transformers movie they would have to have made it a bit smarter but this has just replaced the lengthy, noisy, incoherent chaos of the Transformers films for shorter, semi-coherent, cringy teen movie banality.
Directed by Travis Knight.
Starring Hailee Steinfeld, John Cena, John Ortiz, Pamela Adlon and Jorge Lendeborg Jr. Out on Boxing Day. 114 mins.
Every movie studio is in the business of universe building, so in 2015 Paramount decided that they would join in by building one around Transformers, the fighting robots who can turn into cars. It seemed like a sound choice then as, however rubbish they were, each of the films made a fortune, over a billion dollars in the case of Trans 3 and 4. And then, wouldn't you know, no sooner had they announced their plan than the fifth one came out and barely made half as much as the previous one. That's just typical isn't it? Of all the times for the audience to develop a sense of discernment.
Bumblebee is the tentative first step in this expanded Transformers universe, a kind of children's Transformer film, a prequel set in 1987 and centred on the small yellow and black transformer. Having escaped from their war-torn home planet Cybertron just as it was being taken over by the Decepticons, Bumblebee is sent to Earth to prepare a resistance base for the good Trannies, the Autobots. If I'd just been fooled by a foe called the Decepticons I think I'd bury myself away on a planet called Eggonmyfacetron, or Doh;howdidIfallforthatville. Once on Earth, he loses his memory, hides out as a VW beetle, is brought back to life by a mechanically minded teenage girl called Charlie (Steinfeld) and helps her deal with all her standard American movie teen angst.
I think they were aiming for this to be the ET of Transformers movies, but it's more like the Pete's Dragon of Transformers movies, or rather a John Hughes version of Herbie Rides Again. His classic Breakfast Club is liberally referenced and 80s tunes (Smiths, Simple Minds, A-ha, Rick Astley) are blasted out whenever there is a break in the noise. My assumption was that in making a more kid-friendly Transformers movie they would have to have made it a bit smarter but this has just replaced the lengthy, noisy, incoherent chaos of the Transformers films for shorter, semi-coherent, cringy teen movie banality.